From Consumption to Contribution…A Journey of Empathy

Life teaches us to acquire, aggrandise and consume. It is natural. A sense of gratification is experienced in enjoying wealth and associated pleasures that comes with it.

The journey starts with different levels of gratification. If the life starts with poverty, the basics are not available; where is the question of gratification? On the other hand if you are born into rich household your basics start with gratification. Where is the question of lowering it?

Either way, the focus is on the self…..self preservation to self gratification.

In either way the joy of giving is never experienced. When you give without any expectation, you have trained yourself to parting from clinging. It typically doesn’t come easily. Enhancing Empathy Quotient is very essential before one starts to enjoy giving….unconditional giving.

Without Empathy, the richest man cannot part with a small dime and with Empathy a poor man can give up all that he has.

The degree of empathy is different. We typically display a kind of Empathy when we see beggars and our sense of sinfulness makes us to part with some possession. Can that be called Empathy or condescending behaviour? Make your call. I believe it is condescending and condescending is a type of gratification. A feeling of superiority.

When giving is spontaneous, from heart and with absolutely no attachment it is pure Empathy and Love.

Empathy and Love for own kith and kin is spontaneous. The joy of giving is experienced at home. But kids grow out and leave home in their life journey.

And that joy wants expression again and again. This is the time to step out, extend out and reach out to those whose basic needs can be fulfilled by your little contribution. As you step out to the world of unconditional giving you step into the world of Joy of Empathy.

With advancing age, this desire for connecting with unknown increases in case one is into the habit of experiencing the joy of giving. The choice each one of us have to make and experience.

If you don’t give while living, you are forced to give while leaving.

Why not experience joyful living while living than never to experience it till leaving?

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Anger

Good Evening Dear Friends 😇

Recently we find the anger quotient is on rise particularly in public places. Everyone flares on drop of a hat. A fellow traveller in traffic or an auto rickshaw Driver or a roadside Vendor.. almost everyone from a student to a colleague… all are generally in stress and vent out their anger against any small provocation.

A constant self-awareness in this regard is needed to avoid this trap for ourselves.

A winner is invariably differentiated due it his ability to remain cool 😎 in most adverse conditions.

A best way to face is to anticipate and sense it coming and staying calm in case it materialises. Many a time a polite reply and a nice smile 😊 does most of the Job.

But more importantly if one can step back to understand if one is responsible for the flare up ; then one’s reaction changes completely. An ownership of a conflict in hand changes the perspective completely and one can handle the situation in most matured way.

When it’s beyond you, then it is better to take a walk

Partnership….the most profound synergy to create magic



I am a movie buff. I will enjoy the Cinematic experience till end of my life on this earth. Of course I chose the movie I see and I am able to spot the good ones thru combination of reviews and my gut feels. 

My wife is just opposite. She does not like movies and hates to be in the lounges of Cinema theaters. Gradually she is getting converted. She partners with me and gradually loves what I love. Same is with me. I hate too much time in shopping and window shopping which she likes most. But gradually I am a convert. Still I hate the expense, though I love her happiness….and expense does not matter any more….within my means of course.

Currently, she enquires whether I have any movie on my mind and I enquire any shopping she is contemplating.

We had an arranged marraige and we had our share of misunderstandings from the beginning. We are contrasts and we have learnt to cope with that. The zing is in the contrast. Though we argue and have our strong mindsets, we strangely support each others’ likes and understand the dislikes. We agree to disagree.

Our partnership has withered many a storms in our lives…some contributed by me, some by her and some by my son….but largely by twists and turns of events dragging us into dispair many a times. 

What finally could sail us thru was our synergy, partnership, fighting together and ofcouese His, the Lord Almighty’s helping hand.

The journey is on..still on…our tests are still on.

I am not speaking anything new. I believe every couple will vouch for similar experience. We are no different.

But this is not experinced by individualistic, egocentric arrogants who can never partner with any one. 

This simple truth was so beautifully described in the Movie Shamitabh. Two talented individuals were handicapped otherwise with contrasting weaknesses. When they come together, the magic happens…world comes to their feet. The success breeds the jealousy between them and they separate. They pursue individual endevours and flop.

By the time they realise their mistake the world has fallen apart for them, and one partner is lost for ever leaving the other with eternal guilt.

I simply loved the movie and enjoyed its music as well…the Piddly number sung by Amitabh Bachhan.

But, most importantly it reminded my partnership journey and I am ever grateful to her for what she has done for me and us in the family.

Wihing you all lovely partnership experiences.

Judge-mentality to Sensibility…..Have you scrutinised your journey?i

imageimage Dear Folks! I would sincerely like to draw your attention to this topic of judging people or situation on drop of a hat. We find that , continiously, we are engaged in evaluaions. We are evaluating situations, persons, actions, contexts and what not. It seems that our mind is working overtime in being judgemental. When we encounter a negative situation, we quickly jump to a conclusion about what led to that situation or whois to be blamed. Why do we do so? I think it is years of die hard habit…a habit born out of our need to analyse a negative outcome and need to take protective measures.imageimage We, more often than not, conclude that the blame lies outside us. It is somebody else, not me. Hence, correction lies outside me, and protection lies in my actions. We, consequently take wrong actions like ostracising, disassociating, hating, blaming, taking revenge, getting angry or simply ignoring….but not understanding, not loving. Our ego and selfishness forces us into this kind of habit. We are kind of blind. We are blinded by our prejudice, our superficiality, our selfish-love. We are clouded by our intolerance, our strong likes and dislikes created out of influnence, poor undestandingimage and seer lack of sensibilities.imageb The need is to take a step back. Critically look at the situation like an analyst. Step oyutside the system as if you are not part of it. Look for facts and figures. Observe intently. Many a time unspoken, non-verbal communications are very strong communications. Put yourself in the shoes of the person you are evaluating. Feel from others’ perspective. Develop that sensisibility which questions your prejudice , your orientation, your fears, your propensities and then looks for missing angle. Develop empathy and nothing sort of that. Suddenly, you will find that you live in a different world, a world of Love and Beauty. You will understand that living has another meaning. The meaning will outgrow the self-related orientation and evolve into inclusive orientation. You will find that the external entities are nothing but you in different situations and different understandings. You will enjoy your understanding of them and your actions will emanate from your deep empathetic analysis rather than impulsive fragile emotions born out of prejudice and self-centered inclinations. By judging others we lower our nature and by loving we elevate it. I dont mean blind love when I utter Love. The Love is in accepting the divine manifestations and merging into it. Make your Love so powerful that you can never err in understanding…it becomes intuitive, almost instantaneous without any need for any elaborate analysis. Something like a supercomputer. The potetial, the knowledege is already embedded in you. The need is to discover again or uncover it from closed judgementality. It needs intense practice to break free from old habit and a tranquil mind developed through meditative approach to life. These are not repititions from some scripture study. I am not a saint. I have gone through my trials and tribulations. But, whatever little nectar I gathered in this life-expereince, I am sharing. Accept it if you find meaning in it or else discard it out-right. But trying is never harmful. Wishing you a beautiful journey from crass Judge-mentality to refined sensibility.

Hey! Why are you here? Have you ever questioned yourself?

Why am I born as human being in this earth to my parents and into the environment of social, cultural and economic conditions at the time of my birth?

Was it by a chance occurrence or is there a definite process/ design behind this event/series of events that happened to me or going to happen to me in future?

I am not any saint or mahatma to know this answer. But I have my own understanding and reasoning. Could be stupid to some. Yet I want to share it with you.

My belief is that we create our world. We attract situations, events and happenings to us for the experience that we need so that we can grow from the state that we are into a higher state. The path could be a roller coaster or smooth depending on how we respond.

Basically the experience of life is the essence of living…being born. This body is nothing but an instrument,,I would call a marvelous divine equipment which provides us a means to understand various hues of life.

We are tossed in this river of life, now joyous and next depressed…now happy and next sad. We experience this through the body instrument and the environment we live in. The mind-body combination is like a vehicle with antenna and processor for us store various experiences that we go through and then chose what we would like to associate with.

We re-discover ourselves. We understand what pains us and what gives us joy. We start with our selfish self and see life from the perspective of what I got from it in terms of pleasure and comfort. We deal with our aspirations, frustrations, jealousies, fear, guilt, achievements, joys, happiness, sadness, depression. We start exploring the concept called God or we totally negate this concept. All depends how we respond to life.

As we go through ups and downs, we gradually but surely start understanding the meaninglessness of our selfish pursuit, the short lived pleasures we hanker, the egos the we build as we accumulate so called wealth,knowledge,name and fame.We start getting the feel of impermanent aspects of life. As time starts devouring us, as we start feeling the reality of expiry of this body we start looking for what is worth living for. We start understanding how experiences like service, empathy, fellow-feeling, giving, contributing, loving without condition, connecting, ego-shedding, rising above pain and pleasure, letting go, getting detached, enabling a tranquil mind, and pursuing spiritual path gives more stability, meaning and sense of living rather than aggrandizing, accumulating, pleasure-seeking, ego-building, getting obsessively attached to materialism and sensual pleasures which brings associated pains, depressions and loss of living.

You are living now, what is the guarantee you are living in next moment.

The present is very important and in this present how much humbleness and love you feel in heart is important.

Ultimately you carry emotions and experience with you from life to life, rest you pick from material and give back to material.

Hence, why are you so calculative, future-centrist, self-centered, pleasure-indulgent being getting heavily tossed around? Why not you seek stability & joy through tranquility of mind and emotions of self-less love.

You are here to understand the difference of these two opposite states.

Wishing you happy living…..a-empathy-words 3D Character and Umbrella empathy (1) IF love-does-not-need-to-be-perfect-it-just-needs-to-be-true-facebook-status

The True Self …

very spiritual…..i liked

My Soul In Silence Waits

We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that something deep inside us is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit.
E. E. Cummings

The True Self is not our creation, but God’s. It is the self we are in our depths. It is our capacity for divinity and transcendence.
Sue Monk Kidd

Finally I am coming to the conclusion that my highest ambition is to be what I already am. That I will never fulfill my obligation to surpass myself unless I first accept myself, and if I accept myself fully in the right way, I will already have surpassed myself.
— Thomas Merton from A Search for Solitude

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Go Down the Rabbit Hole: A Writer’s Manifesto

A fantastic piece of writing. I agree. I have felt the most that is written here.

Writing for Digital Media

1. You are the work. The work is you: both an articulation of the self and a possibility for self-reflection. Be honest in creation: allow yourself to bleed into the work, but also allow it to work on you. Your work can show you things: illuminate and clarify your own thoughts, motivations, actions. If you do it right, you will find the work changing you, too.

2. Thinking is process. Laying on the floor. Sitting on park benches. Getting lost on purpose. These are all working. Learn the difference between mindless distraction and mindful wandering.

3. Go down the rabbit hole. Sometimes the work isn’t about what you think it is. Allow yourself to get lost down alleyways, to follow a train of thought around a corner. Don’t feel you need to reign yourself in. Too much focus squeezes all the possibility for revelation out of the work.

4. Fear…

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Time Travel on Facebook

I am re-blogging this to emphasize a point that we need to look at life more from how we live every moment rather than what will happen in future or what happened in the past.

The Green Study

canstockphoto19374534

I’ve written before about my aversion to some social media. Besides the conspicuous consumption of time, Facebook is how I found out that my best friend from 5th grade had lost the use of both her legs and arms in a car accident. Which led me to a search where I found out that another classmate and her brother were both dead in their early 40s. It was jarring and traumatic. These faces, frozen in my mind’s eye, were young and healthy and living happy lives in some far off world. Anything beyond that failed to reach my imagination.

When I was in my teens, we moved to a house, town and school far away from where I’d grown up. It was, in reality, only about 40 miles away, but rural miles. No public transportation or extra family car or cell phone plans to keep in touch with old…

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A Night to Remember- MIS Dept. (Bajaj Auto Limited)- Camp Bonding@TEMGARH

I am publishing a nice description of a trip by my dept. colleagues.This piece was written by the youngest of the lot..fresh from Engineering college. I published it for you to feel the emotion of a youngster from my team whom I selected to join me only 6 months back. He told me that his hobby is creative writing and I liked his style.

Whole Idea is to create such moments in life, not only with family and friends, but also with colleagues.

Enjoy the reading.

A break from the hustle-bustle of daily life, a time where we as coworkers could spend time together, bonding and learning more about each other, with these agendas in mind the MIS team had a Get-Together at Camp Temgarh for a night to remember and make a sweet memory for all of us to cherish.

Itinerary:

Located 30 Kms away from Pune, Camp Temgarh is located near the quaint village Mulshi on the Lavasa Road.  The landscape around the intimate resort is beautiful, surrounded by hills and a lively stream that is close by.

Between luxurious tents in a wonderful amenity, a small ground for playing outdoor games like cricket, football, basketball and a pool table, table tennis for indoor games the facilities are wonderful, the scope for enjoyment is plentiful. The bonfire at night with excellent barbecue is the right stage for a night to remember.   

The energetic and excited MIS Team started from Bajaj Auto at 8:45 AM on a chilly winter morning, as the mist settled down and the sun graced with a warm smile. Picking up members on the way, most of the team headed to the destination on a Tempo Traveler, a few trailing along on personal vehicles. 

 

The long and winding road trip was a treat by itself, buzzed with the hooting by Ashutosh and the Irshad by Abhay. The team as a whole stumbled around to the destination by 11 AM, swelling with anticipation.

After a short welcome, the team collected together at the Gazebo and after much discussion on a soft drink, the plan was announced and tents were allotted on a lottery.

Sports Activity:

The green field served as the battleground when the group split into two teams for a cricket match under the blazing afternoon sun. The five over match was tense, the team headed by Sarat scoring big with beautiful strokes from Nilesh that never landed inside the boundary, and Sharad proving that his age is not much of a hindrance for taking quick runs. Sachin found himself diving into the dirt while taking a run, unfortunately a long distance away from the crease. But his efforts were well appreciated.

The team headed by Sarat replied strongly, with equal and good contributions by Milind, Mr. Jorapur and Mr. Rathore. The team clinched their victory in no time.

The highlight of the match, of course, was the group collectively working together when the ball fell among the brambles, turning the cricket game into an unexpected scavenger hunt.

Right after lunch, it was time for some relaxing indoor games. Ranjit and Lalit showed their expertise at the pool, rolling the balls perfectly into the holes. 

Riverside adventure

Headed by none other than a well-trained Alsatian, the group marched towards the river, the muddy bank proving to be a challenge to get into. Instead, a daring decision was made to climb up a steep slope and explore the unknown. The climb proved to be a challenge, muddy shoes slipped on the ground and the only supports were the vines, trees with thorn-filled trunks. The tough hike proved to be fruitful, as what awaited was a rocky river bank, perfect for getting in and have an exciting swim in the chilly water.

After the swim, the cool evening felt the right time for another cricket match, this time Ranjit showed magic with his bowling causing Mr. Rathore to fondly nickname him, Muraleedharan.

Campfire

The night finally settled in, glittering stars decorated the night sky with their shine, a sight rare for the city-dwellers who mostly lived in flats. Bottles of drinks were opened and with a loud cheer, the night to remember had officially begun.  Huddled around the campfire, with a strong music in the backdrop, the group enjoyed their drinks. A relay drinking match, dancing to the music and a hilarious game of Damsharas, all these events contributed to a wonderful night—a night that was definitely worth remembering.

As the clock struck past twelve, the MIS team celebrated the birthday of Mr. Milind Kasture and continued late into the night, collectively singing beautiful Bollywood songs.

Parting Words:

Needless to say, it was an unforgettable night. Bonding with coworkers in a completely different environment was an experience, a relaxation from the hustle-bustle of daily life and a rest from the rush for completing projects and meeting deadlines. The effect this bonding exercise would have on a professional level would be profound too. Pic1 Pic2  Pic4 Pic5 Pic6 Pic7 Pic8 Pic9 Pic10 Pic11 Pic12 Pic13 Pic14 Pic15 Pic16 Pic17 Pic18 Pic19 Pic20 Pic21 Pic22 Pic23 Pic24 Pic25 Pic26 Pic27 Pic30 Pic31